SOUL-TIED 😬

With so many people jumping from relationship to relationship—it’s a form of self preservation when you completely remove sex from the equation. You know that when you have sex with a person your souls are spiritually tied together, right? YESSS!!! That is what is called a soul-tie; the literal act of becoming one with another person and your souls connecting.

“it’s a form of self preservation when you completely remove sex from the equation. ”

“In a healthy relationship, sexual intercourse is used to unify two people in a way that is nurturing and empowering. It is the manner in which a couple shows their love and commitment to one another. However, in a volatile, hostile or unhealthy relationship like mine, sex can tie your soul to someone who is disempowering and damaged.” - Jazz Keyes Excerpt from Jet 2016

Have you ever noticed that when you get into a new relationship with another person, it’s sometimes hard to explain why you feel drained when you deal with them? Do you ever wonder why you can’t truly connect, or maybe you’ve already connected through sex but nowhere else in your relationship. This is the most accurate part about a soul-tie—when you connect with a person you are not aligned with you exchange energies [baggage, previous traumas, other sexual partners] and the energy stays with you either making you strong or draining you. Perhaps the problem is you or maybe it’s the other person. The only thing that is true and constant is that if neither of you have done the required work that is necessary before getting into a new relationship there is greater possibility your souls are still tied to past relationships.

In order to move forward and prepare for a future with a new mate you have to properly heal and disconnect yourself from your past. Sometimes we like to try to hold on to old stuff—memories, emails, pictures, videos, gifts, etc., but these are some of the very things that keep us connected not just mentally but emotionally, spiritually, and physically. The feeling of not connecting with your significant other because they have not allowed themselves to break the bonds from their past loves or heal their brokenness can be completely damaging in a new relationship. I once thought I’d found the love of my life...but what I learned is when it came to true intimacy my partner, my mate...significant other, he was totally incapable of connecting with me on a soul level, because he was soul-tied to someone else.

If you are one of the [unlucky] folks that happen to be dating in today’s climate, it can be considered a hardship when you bring up the fact that you’re NOT having sex. Sometimes people who aren’t on the same type of journey may not hold the same respect for a person who is on the path to self healing, deep introspection, and evolvement. It’s so important that moving forward if/when you begin dating again you listen closely to that little voice in your head telling you to chill out, that’s the voice of discernment. You need to be able learn to be accountable for your own actions and to hold yourself to a higher standard. You shouldn’t put yourself in situations where you can trip yourself up for a temporary fix, especially after you’ve started healing. You need to have discipline—the discernment is for the other person and the discipline is for you!

This P*ssy Is On Punishment!

I may be relatively vulgar with my approach but this is coming from a place of sincerity. If you’re reading this, then frankly I see no point in sugar coating this situation you need to hear this! 

You’re an adult it’s okay you’ve heard the word pussy before and if you’re feeling offended I guess you should leave. If you’re not offended that’s good, because here’s the part where I talk about how glorious, magnificent and beautiful you are. If you haven’t already learned that your body is a temple [the only one you get, in fact] YOU’RE GONNA LEARN TODAY!

Today is the day you begin to unlearn a lot of the unhealthy practices you’ve been applying to your life over time. This “ pussy punishment” is not permanent [unless you want it to be], it’s really more about self discipline and allowing a renewing of your mind. Having self control isn’t about anybody else but YOU [and you’re God]! You must have the will and the motivation to change who/what you attract in your life and that starts with understanding celibacy. Change the way you think, the types of conversations you’re having and feed your consciousness with nourishing content*. This transition to celibacy is going to take a bit of practice so I suggest that once you’ve changed your mindset you begin to set new intentions for yourself and start journaling your journey. Looking back on your mindset after a few months will be positive for your growth in this space. From this healing space you will be able to see more clearly the type of person who you should rightfully connect with.

IF you happen to deviate from this new path, don’t feel like you can’t finish the journey just pull up your big girl pants and stop putting yourself in compromising situations. Remember, mistakes happen, just don’t beat yourself up for too long. You’re not a failure...but DO NOT keep doing it, then it’s a pattern that you won’t be able to pull away from. The whole point of this journey is about learning who you are and falling deeply—madly in love with yourself so you that you learn and know how to love and be loved in return.

A few books I’d recommend reading for nourishment:

Frustrated AF!

I’m on one today—I’m sincerely trying to stay focused on maintaining my balance.

In my mind I’m staring at him...who is “him”??? He is a taste I’ve been longing for, the physical manifestation of the mental picture I’ve built in my mind over the past few years. I’m thinking I want him to talk nice to me, talk sweet and talk dirty.

Look Sis—I’m celibate NOT dead and the struggle is REAL! It’s real because I’d been trying to eliminate thinking about sex entirely (for the record this doesn’t work nor is thinking about it actually a bad thing) but, alas I am a sexual being and all the energy I’ve been harnessing has been begging me for a release. You shouldn’t have to feel guilty about fantasizing or thinking about sex…the trick is to learn to have CONTROL over your desires.

See, I already know this song and dance and the storyline of when you get physically tangled with someone you’re not in alignment with. When you’re not in alignment with the other person it is easy to lose focus of the path you’re supposed because your core values for life and love are are not set up the same. It’s so easy to get fixated on the physical pleasure and then it begins to seep into your spirit...I’m NOT about that life. It’s all fun and games until you are soul tied with an ill intended soul; the exchange of energy is real and being tied with that negative energy will have you f*cked up. This energy is considered negative because it is working against you and not for you.

“It’s important to note that our creations and sexual energy manifest in the same way within our body, meaning they are one source. When our creational energy is not being used and becomes temporarily dormant within us our sexual energy becomes dominant within us.” -Victoria Leanna

I must shift my focus into other areas of my life because the more I focus on these things the less my flesh will have to cling onto. That’s why on this journey I gotta make the best choices for myself, the onus is on me. I know the right thing for me right now is to be still and put my thoughts on my higher self and realign myself with my God and where I’m going with my life. These urges are strong AF though and the only thing real about me resisting the urges is I want what’s mine. I’m not willing to give in to temporary gratification with someone who doesn’t have my best interests at heart. I don’t want a friend with “benefits”, I am the benefit! I’m a WHOLE INVESTMENT!!!